To clarify, I was not complaining about the "help" reserve. It makes sense, I was not thinking about it when I typed "help" and was unaware of the reserve. Now I know.
When I said "maybe this isn't the forum for me" was the only nice alternative I could think of at the time in replace of (don't be a lame forum Nazi). I certainly don't troll forums saying things like "Do we really need a poll over your paint job?".
Anyways, back to the original point. The brakes seem fine now. I bleed them and then topped off the reservoir. Did not see air, just fluid when I cracked each valve. Not sure what the exact problem was, seemed like some sort of vacuum. Thanks everyone that contributed. Like FlyingVan911 said, it's better safe than sorry... brakes are a serious topic. I do not regret asking for input, even if resolved after a day's labor.