Posted the jist of the ad here, since it was kind of interesting.
Don't get caught at home in the Zombie Apocalypse ("ZA")! Any serious zombie survivalist knows that the first order of business in the ZA is to get out of dodge. In order to have zombies, you need people. In order to avoid zombies, you want to go where there are no people, and you want to go there fast! Ergo, any serious zombie prepper will have a zombie survival vehicle ("ZSV")
Necessary attributes of a ZSV are as follows:
1. 4-wheel drive: because zombies and zombie food (a.k.a. non-zombie survivalist) love nice smooth pavement. If you want to survive the ZA, your ZSV needs to be able to go off-road. The Military issue M1009 K5 Blazer has Chevy's legendary 4-wheel drive with locking differentials.
2. Diesel and/or alternative fuel: The wealth of knowledge that is Hollywood has taught us that there is no such thing as a safe gas station. We know that in the ZA there will be at least 1 zombie hiding at every gas station in America. That zombie will wait until you, or the hot girl you saved from a ZFM (Zombie Flash Mob), are thinking back to happier times and then pounce. Therefore, stopping at as few gas stations as possible is a necessity for your ZSV. With a 600 mile per tank range, diesel and alternative fuel capabilities (people have claimed to run these engines on peanut oil), the M1009 is an ideal ZSV.
3. Zombie Guard: Some people politely refer to the heavy duty front grill protection, and reinforced rear bumper on military blazers as "cattle guards". PFT!! yeah right. Serious zombie preppers know better. That giant hunk of reinforced steel that is anchored to the frame of the blazer is good for one thing and one thing only, plowing through an aggressive crowd of undead walkers. We all know that zombies have no fear, but even the toughest zombie is going to flinch when they hear the roar of a 6.2 liter diesel V8 revving its RPMs. Once said tough zombie looks up to see a crimson-stained zombie guard attached to a mobile zombie disposal unit bearing down on him, that zombie is going to drop an undead crap in his undead pants. The M1009 issue CUCV comes standard with just such a zombie guard.
4. Removable Top: for the advanced Zombie survivalist, there comes a time in the ZA when you stop running and make a stand. When that time comes, your stand should be made from a protected highpoint with a 360 degree view so that you can empty a 120 round fully automatic street sweeper shotgun (not included) into the oncoming hoard of D-comps no matter how they come at you. The M1009 has a fully removable shell to allow for just such an occasion.
5. Pure badassedness: The most important quality of any ZSV is realizing that more important than actually surviving the ZA, is making sure everyone (especially the hot babes) knows that you are just the right combination of bad ass and hero to get them safely to at least the first gas station. With the M1009 military blazer you can let your ZSV do all your bad ass talking for you. Nothing screams, "I am just crazy enough to turn you on" like rolling up in a vehicle specifically designed to expedite the extermination and escape of zombies masses.
Two owners. Me and Uncle Sam.
Less than 6,000 miles (yes. that is the correct and verified mileage).
6.2L V8 Diesel engine
T400 automatic 3-speed transmission
Paper work is all done, once you get it running, getting registration is simple.
I bought this at auction last year and drove it from Nellis AFB in Las Vegas to Phoenix. It made the trip with no problem.
I started working on restoring the vehicle, but just don't have the time or energy. It has new batteries, a new starter, and the starter relay has been upgraded.
I started pulling the wiring harness to replace it and that is where I gave up. There is a short somewhere in the engine electrical that is draining the batteries.
You will need to tow as I prepped it for a long-term project (most fluids drained).
Rear glass is in, but the crank for the rear window is missing.
Driver side window is missing.
opcorn:
