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.I am not going to get in the debate of what is better 3 or 5 but I will say I use 5 in my truck. But on to the more pertinent question that has not really been dealt with. Your wheel cylinder cups swelling 2x it’s original size is a major problem and is not related to what fluid you use as these parts are compatible with both fluids. You must have gotten a faulty part because that should not happen regardless of what fluid used. I would return them and find a different source as that is just not normal or acceptable.
Maybe the rubber is some sort of import?
The rules are different here than other places.
Sadly, the seller and the buyer doesn't know they have a problem until it is too late.