CHUCKY'S TREE HOUSE !

[Guyfang]

Here is the long and short of it. Arlo, was against the V/N war. He got drafted. Went to the induction center. At the very end, he had to fill out information on if he had ever been arrested. So he told them about getting arrested for tossing trash out in the woods. That disqualified him from being drafted. Its a more or less true story. The song is great, like I wrote, EVERYONE in my generation can sing it. The movie is great, as it makes terrible fun of the Army, the gov and the system. Its VERY funny to me, but if you aint been in the situation, might not be for you. I got drunk and burned my draft card the night before I went to JOIN the Army. Thought if you join, the card is not needed. Boy did the nice man at the induction center, screaming in my ear, convince me different. I lied and told him my dog ate it. The induction center brought back memories. The part where they are all filling out the info cards. How I laughed. When we did it, you had to have your finger prints put on the card for record. The 50 of us were all in a cramped room, all filled out the cards, and we all gave our cards to someone else. So for the first 12 years in the army, my official finger prints were from someone I have no idea who was. Oh, Alice, had a restaurant in and old church, where "you could get anything you want, except Alice". He helped Alice and her husband clean up the church. Thats where the trash came from. Watch the movie.

 

[Third From Texas]

can you post just that part of the movie ? BUDDDDDDDDDDDYY !!!

The only place I've found it for free was on YouTube.

And yes, Alice was a girl. She own's a restaurant. But Alice doesn't live in the restaurant, she lives in the church nearby the
Restaurant, in the bell tower with her husband Ray and Facha, the dog....

 

[Third From Texas]

You can get anything you want at Alice's restaurant
You can get anything you want at Alice's restaurant
Walk right in, it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at Alice's restaurant

This song is called "Alice's Restaurant
"It's about Alice, and the
Restaurant, but "Alice's Restaurant" is not the name of the restaurant,
That's just the name of the song
That's why I call the song "Alice's Restaurant."

Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago, two years ago, on Thanksgiving,
When my friend and I went up to visit Alice at the restaurant

But Alice doesn't live in the restaurant, she lives in the church nearby the
Restaurant, in the bell tower with her husband Ray and Facha, the dog

And livin' in the bell tower like that, they got a lot of room downstairs
Where the pews used to be, and havin' all that room (seein' as how they took
Out all the pews), they decided that they didn't have to take out their
Garbage for a long time.

We got up here and found all the garbage in there and we decided that it'd
Be a friendly gesture for us to take the garbage down to the city dump

So we took the half-a-ton of garbage, put it in the back of a red VW
Microbus, took shovels and rakes and implements of destruction, and headed
On toward the city dump. Well, we got there and there was a big sign and a
Chain across the dump sayin', "this dump is closed on Thanksgiving," and
We'd never heard of a dump closed on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in
Our eyes, we drove off into the sunset lookin' for another place to put the garbage

We didn't find one till we came to a side road, and off the side of the side
Road was another fifteen-foot cliff, and at the bottom of the cliff was
Another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big pile was better than
Two little piles, and rather than bring that one up, we decided to throw
Ours down. That's what we did

Drove back to the church, had a Thanksgiving dinner that couldn't be beat,
Went to sleep, and didn't get up until the next morning, when we got a phone
Call from Officer Obie. He said, "kid, we found your name on a envelope at
The bottom of a half a ton of garbage and I just wanted to know if you had
Any information about it"

And I said, "yes sir, Officer Obie, I cannot tell a lie. I put that envelope
Under that garbage." After speakin' to Obie for about forty-five minutes on
The telephone, we finally arrived at the truth of the matter and he said
That we had to go down and pick up the garbage, and also had to go down and
Speak to him at the Police Officer Station. So we got in the red VW microbus
With the shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on
Toward the Police Officer Station

Now, friends, there was only one of two things that Obie could've done at
The Police Officer Station, and the first was that he could've given us a
Medal for bein' so brave and honest on the telephone (which wasn't very
Likely, and we didn't expect it), and the other thing was that he could've
Bawled us out and told us never to be seen drivin' garbage around in the
Vicinity again, which is what we expected

But when we got to the Police Officer Station, there was a third possibility
That we hadn't even counted upon, and we was both immediately arrested,
Handcuffed, and I said, "Obie, I can't pick up the garbage with these here
Handcuffs on." He said "shut up kid, and get in the back of the patrol car"

And that's what we did, sat in the back of the patrol car, and drove to
The quote scene of the crime unquote

I want to tell you 'bout the town of Stockbridge, Massachusetts, where this is
Happenin'. They got three stop signs, two police officers, and one police
Car, but when we got to the scene of the crime, there was five police
Officers and three police cars, bein' the biggest crime of the last fifty
Years and everybody wanted to get in the newspaper story about it

And they was usin' up all kinds of cop equipment that they had hangin'
Around the Police Officer Station. They was takin' plaster tire tracks,
Footprints, dog-smellin' prints and they took twenty-seven 8 x 10 colored
Glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of
Each one explainin' what each one was, to be used as evidence against us
Took pictures of the approach, the getaway, the northwest corner, the
Southwest corner
And that's not to mention the aerial photography!

After the ordeal, we went back to the jail. Obie said he was gonna put us in a cell

He said "kid, I'm gonna put you in a cell
I want your wallet and your belt"
I said, "Obie, I can understand your wantin' my wallet, so I don't have any
Money to spend in the cell, but what do you want my belt for?" and he said
"Kid, we don't want any hangin's
I said, "Obie, did you think I was gonna
Hang myself for litterin'?"

Obie said he was makin' sure, and, friends, Obie was, 'cause he took out the
Toilet seat so I couldn't hit myself over the head and drown, and he took
Out the toilet paper so I couldn't bend the bars, roll the toilet paper out
The window, slide down the roll and have an escape. Obie was makin' sure

It was about four or five hours later that Alice (remember Alice?
There's a song about Alice)
Alice came by and, with a few nasty words to Obie on the
Side, bailed us out of jail, and we went back to the church, had another
Thanksgiving dinner that couldn't be beat, and didn't get up until the next
Morning, when we all had to go to court. We walked in, sat down, Obie came
In with the twenty-seven 8 times 10 colored glossy pictures with the circles and
Arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one, sat down

Man came in, said, "All rise!" We all stood up, and Obie stood up with the
Twenty-seven 8 times 10 colored glossy pictures, and the judge walked in, sat
Down, with a seein' eye dog and he sat down. We sat down

Obie looked at the seein' eye dog then at the twenty-seven 8 x 10
Colored glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the
Back of each one and looked at the seein' eye dog and then at
The twenty-seven 8 x 10 colored glossy pictures with the circles and arrows
And a paragraph on the back of each on and began to cry

Because Obie came to the realization that it was a typical case of American
Blind justice, and there wasn't nothin' he could do about it, and the judge
Wasn't gonna look at the twenty-seven 8 by 10 colored glossy pictures with
The circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explainin'
What each one was, to be used as evidence against us

And we was fined fifty dollars and had to pick up the garbage in the snow

But that's not what I'm here to tell you about
I'm here to talk about the draft
They got a buildin' down in New York City called Whitehall Street, where you
Walk in, you get injected, inspected, detected, infected, neglected and selected!

I went down and got my physical examination one day, and I walked in, sat
Down (got good and drunk the night before, so I looked and felt my best when
I went in that morning, 'cause I wanted to look like the All-American Kid
From New York City. I wanted to feel like I wanted to be the
All-american Kid from New York), and I walked in, sat down, I was hung down
Brung down, hung up and all kinds of mean, nasty, ugly things

And I walked in, I sat down, they gave me a piece of paper that said "Kid
See the psychiatrist in room 604"

I went up there, I said, "Shrink, I want to kill. I want to kill! I want to see
Blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth! Eat dead, burnt bodies! I
Mean Kill. Kill!"

And I started jumpin' up and down, yellin' "KILL! Kill!" and he started
Jumpin' up and down with me, and we was both jumpin' up and down, yellin'
"Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill!" and the sergeant came over, pinned a metal on
me, sent me down the hall, said, "You're our boy."

 

[Third From Texas]

Didn't feel too good about it.

Proceeded on down the hall gettin more injections, inspections,
detections, neglections and all kinds of stuff that they was doin' to me
at the thing there, and I was there for two hours, three hours, four
hours, I was there for a long time going through all kinds of mean nasty
ugly things and I was just having a tough time there, and they was
inspecting, injecting every single part of me, and they was leaving no
part untouched. Proceeded through, and when I finally came to the see the
last man, I walked in, walked in sat down after a whole big thing there,
and I walked up and said, "What do you want?" He said, "Kid, we only got
one question. Have you ever been arrested?"

And I proceeded to tell him the story of the Alice's Restaurant Massacre,
with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff like that and all
the phenome... - and he stopped me right there and said, "Kid, did you ever
go to court?"

And I proceeded to tell him the story of the twenty seven eight-by-ten
colour glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on
the back of each one, and he stopped me right there and said, "Kid, I want
you to go and sit down on that bench that says Group W ... NOW kid!!"

And I, I walked over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's
where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after
committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! And
they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the
bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest
father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly
'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me
and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay
$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench
there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till I
said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand,
and we had a great time on the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing,
father raping, all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about on the
bench. And everything was fine, we was smoking cigarettes and all kinds of
things, until the Sargeant came over, had some paper in his hand, held it
up and said.

"Kids, this-piece-of-paper's-got-47-words-37-sentences-58-words-we-wanna-
know-details-of-the-crime-time-of-the-crime-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-
you-gotta-say-pertaining-to-and-about-the-crime-I-want-to-know-arresting-
officer's-name-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta-say", and talked for
forty-five minutes and nobody understood a word that he said, but we had
fun filling out the forms and playing with the pencils on the bench there,
and I filled out the massacre with the four part harmony, and wrote it
down there, just like it was, and everything was fine and I put down the
pencil, and I turned over the piece of paper, and there, there on the
other side, in the middle of the other side, away from everything else on
the other side, in parentheses, capital letters, quotated, read the
following words:

("KID, HAVE YOU REHABILITATED YOURSELF?")

I went over to the sargent, said, "Sargeant, you got a lot a damn gall to
ask me if I've rehabilitated myself, I mean, I mean, I mean that just, I'm
sittin' here on the bench, I mean I'm sittin here on the Group W bench
'cause you want to know if I'm moral enough join the army, burn women,
kids, houses and villages after bein' a litterbug." He looked at me and
said, "Kid, we don't like your kind, and we're gonna send you fingerprints
off to Washington."

And friends, somewhere in Washington enshrined in some little folder, is a
study in black and white of my fingerprints. And the only reason I'm
singing you this song now is cause you may know somebody in a similar
situation, or you may be in a similar situation, and if your in a
situation like that there's only one thing you can do and that's walk into
the shrink wherever you are, just walk in say "Shrink, You can get
anything you want, at Alice's restaurant.". And walk out. You know, if
one person, just one person does it they may think he's really sick and
they won't take him. And if two people, two people do it, in harmony,
they may think they're both faggots and they won't take either of them.
And three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people walking in
singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out. They may think it's an
organization. And can you, can you imagine fifty people a day, I said
fifty people a day walking in singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and
walking out. And friends they may thinks it's a movement.

And that's what it is, the Alice's Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement, and
all you got to do to join is sing it the next time it come's around on the
guitar.

With feeling. So we'll wait for it to come around on the guitar, here and
sing it when it does. Here it comes.

You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant
You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant

That was horrible. If you want to end war and stuff you got to sing loud.
I've been singing this song now for twenty five minutes. I could sing it
for another twenty five minutes. I'm not proud... or tired.

So we'll wait till it comes around again, and this time with four part
harmony and feeling.

We're just waitin' for it to come around is what we're doing.

All right now.

 

[coachgeo]

I was thinking Creep by Radio Head and Just a Gigolo by Louis Prima, David Lee Roth, Louis Armstrong (Satchmo) and others.

Very happy it was nothing like American Pie by Don McLean

 

[M35fan]

Thank you its like being a banjo player 90% of the time your out of tune and the 10% you are creates mixed emotions !!!! And there wasnt a mass of hair on my hat holder to start off with i rubbed it all off with my hand trying to think of a better idea !

So it's similar to playing a 12 string guitar. You spend half your time tuning it, and the other half playing it out of tune.

 

[Lothar]

Well, this will be playing in my head all day long. Thanks? I don't want a pickle.

 

[chucky]

Didn't feel too good about it.

Proceeded on down the hall gettin more injections, inspections,
detections, neglections and all kinds of stuff that they was doin' to me
at the thing there, and I was there for two hours, three hours, four
hours, I was there for a long time going through all kinds of mean nasty
ugly things and I was just having a tough time there, and they was
inspecting, injecting every single part of me, and they was leaving no
part untouched. Proceeded through, and when I finally came to the see the
last man, I walked in, walked in sat down after a whole big thing there,
and I walked up and said, "What do you want?" He said, "Kid, we only got
one question. Have you ever been arrested?"

And I proceeded to tell him the story of the Alice's Restaurant Massacre,
with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff like that and all
the phenome... - and he stopped me right there and said, "Kid, did you ever
go to court?"

And I proceeded to tell him the story of the twenty seven eight-by-ten
colour glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on
the back of each one, and he stopped me right there and said, "Kid, I want
you to go and sit down on that bench that says Group W ... NOW kid!!"

And I, I walked over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's
where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after
committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! And
they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the
bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest
father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly
'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me
and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay
$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench
there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till I
said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand,
and we had a great time on the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing,
father raping, all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about on the
bench. And everything was fine, we was smoking cigarettes and all kinds of
things, until the Sargeant came over, had some paper in his hand, held it
up and said.

"Kids, this-piece-of-paper's-got-47-words-37-sentences-58-words-we-wanna-
know-details-of-the-crime-time-of-the-crime-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-
you-gotta-say-pertaining-to-and-about-the-crime-I-want-to-know-arresting-
officer's-name-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta-say", and talked for
forty-five minutes and nobody understood a word that he said, but we had
fun filling out the forms and playing with the pencils on the bench there,
and I filled out the massacre with the four part harmony, and wrote it
down there, just like it was, and everything was fine and I put down the
pencil, and I turned over the piece of paper, and there, there on the
other side, in the middle of the other side, away from everything else on
the other side, in parentheses, capital letters, quotated, read the
following words:

("KID, HAVE YOU REHABILITATED YOURSELF?")

I went over to the sargent, said, "Sargeant, you got a lot a damn gall to
ask me if I've rehabilitated myself, I mean, I mean, I mean that just, I'm
sittin' here on the bench, I mean I'm sittin here on the Group W bench
'cause you want to know if I'm moral enough join the army, burn women,
kids, houses and villages after bein' a litterbug." He looked at me and
said, "Kid, we don't like your kind, and we're gonna send you fingerprints
off to Washington."

And friends, somewhere in Washington enshrined in some little folder, is a
study in black and white of my fingerprints. And the only reason I'm
singing you this song now is cause you may know somebody in a similar
situation, or you may be in a similar situation, and if your in a
situation like that there's only one thing you can do and that's walk into
the shrink wherever you are, just walk in say "Shrink, You can get
anything you want, at Alice's restaurant.". And walk out. You know, if
one person, just one person does it they may think he's really sick and
they won't take him. And if two people, two people do it, in harmony,
they may think they're both faggots and they won't take either of them.
And three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people walking in
singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out. They may think it's an
organization. And can you, can you imagine fifty people a day, I said
fifty people a day walking in singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and
walking out. And friends they may thinks it's a movement.

And that's what it is, the Alice's Restaurant Anti-Massacre Movement, and
all you got to do to join is sing it the next time it come's around on the
guitar.

With feeling. So we'll wait for it to come around on the guitar, here and
sing it when it does. Here it comes.

You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant
You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant

That was horrible. If you want to end war and stuff you got to sing loud.
I've been singing this song now for twenty five minutes. I could sing it
for another twenty five minutes. I'm not proud... or tired.

So we'll wait till it comes around again, and this time with four part
harmony and feeling.

We're just waitin' for it to come around is what we're doing.

All right now.

This is like your first introduction to mushrooms or acid (A BIT MUCH TO ABSORB IN JUST ONE NIGHT) LOL Thanks for all typing you did i didnt mean to do all this just some click and paste sorta thing ! Im going to have to go get a cigar and take all this in !

 

[Third From Texas]

This is like your first introduction to mushrooms or acid (A BIT MUCH TO ABSORB IN JUST ONE NIGHT) LOL Thanks for all typing you did i didnt mean to do all this just some click and paste sorta thing ! Im going to have to go get a cigar and take all this in !

You can find the song and just listen to the words. It's way better.

 

[chucky]

You can find the song and just listen to the words. It's way better.

That was a first for me ! I listened to the cut by Arlo on farmaid 2005 and cant beleave i hadnt ever herd this tune before ! My ears have taken in so much music in my life i expect it to pop open any day now ! And i wouldnt have had it any other way ! Thanks for the heads up !

 

[Third From Texas]

I had a friend here who married a guy from MI in the mid-70's. Dude played the guitar and did a great rendition of the song. It was the first time I'd ever heard it (I was more into hard rock than folk music). Had a lot a fun sitting around bon fires and singing that tune over the years. The original album had some other catchy tunes on it.

My brother served two tours (first in Hueys then in Cobras). I was raised to respect our military, not protest them. So part of me never really liked Arlo's music and the anti-war folk stuff from that era. My brother got spit on coming home thru San Francisco and I've had a rather hostile attitude towards protesters ever since I was a kid. And I still do...

 

[Third From Texas]

That was a first for me ! I listened to the cut by Arlo on farmaid 2005 and cant beleave i hadnt ever herd this tune before ! My ears have taken in so much music in my life i expect it to pop open any day now ! And i wouldnt have had it any other way ! Thanks for the heads up !

Honestly, these days I appreciate his dad's music way more than Arlo's.

Real old-school folk w/o the anti-war whining.

 

[Third From Texas]

"Pause for Mrs Claus" is classic Alro as well as "Motorcycle Song".

Let's get Santa Clause 'cause;
Santa Clause has a red suit
He's a communist
And a beard, and long hair
Must be a pacifist
What's in the pipe that he's smoking?

 

[chucky]

I had a friend here who married a guy from MI in the mid-70's. Dude played the guitar and did a great rendition of the song. It was the first time I'd ever heard it (I was more into hard rock than folk music). Had a lot a fun sitting around bon fires and singing that tune over the years. The original album had some other catchy tunes on it.

My brother served two tours (first in Hueys then in Cobras). I was raised to respect our military, not protest them. So part of me never really liked Arlo's music and the anti-war folk stuff from that era. My brother got spit on coming home thru San Francisco and I've had a rather hostile attitude towards protesters ever since I was a kid. And I still do...

Im with you ! Thats probly why it wasnt in my music background ! And still have no time for POS that would do that to any of our boys coming home ! Like my favorite modern day poet said If you dont love it LEAVE it ! Merle Haggard !

 

[chucky]

Honestly, these days I appreciate his dad's music way more than Arlo's.

Real old-school folk w/o the anti-war whining.

I had no idea his dad did THIS LAND ! Just watched a doc by arlo on going as a child to visit his dad in GRAYSTONE phic hospital he died of HUNTINGTON disease

 

[Guyfang]

The disrespect shown to us in the early 70's was and is, disgusting. Leaving Basic, in 1972, I had to sadly, ride a bus. Pushed, shoved and yes, spit at. Called all sorts of rather disgusting names. Threatened in the toilet in the Sacramento buss station. Its another reason I hate California. It wasn't so bad in Utah. Being called a "Baby Killer", 12 hours out of basic, and not being served in a burger joint, because i was in uniform. In Washington D.C. it was almost as bad as in California. None of us went anyplace in uniform, but our haircut was a dead giveaway. And 100% of the people who did it to us, were young people. The same ****ER's that are now sitting in congress and deciding where to next send our Military. It makes me want to puke.

 

[chucky]

The disrespect shown to us in the early 70's was and is, disgusting. Leaving Basic, in 1972, I had to sadly, ride a bus. Pushed, shoved and yes, spit at. Called all sorts of rather disgusting names. Threatened in the toilet in the Sacramento buss station. Its another reason I hate California. It wasn't so bad in Utah. Being called a "Baby Killer", 12 hours out of basic, and not being served in a burger joint, because i was in uniform. In Washington D.C. it was almost as bad as in California. None of us went anyplace in uniform, but our haircut was a dead giveaway. And 100% of the people who did it to us, were young people. The same ****ER's that are now sitting in congress and deciding where to next send our Military. It makes me want to puke.

What goes around comes around and they will get theirs one day ! Big Beleaver in karma ! Its just never quick enough for me !

 

[chucky]

With much help today me and my CONSIGLIERE used a long shaft hyd engine hoist cylinder and some square tubing and jacked the cab up enough to BRACE THE SHAT OUT OF THE CAB !!!!! and rebuilt the cab latch so now ive got to take another month off for my back lol but the trucks back to snuff ! So now i can rest peacefully !!! The world is whole again ! Theyre on sale for 44 bucks on amz and im going to use it on my spare tire hoist when im whole again !

 

[Guyfang]

Why am I not surprised? Good work Chucky! Now take a break.

 

[m715mike]

@chucky - You, sir, take the phrase “no rest for the weary” to a whole new level.

Hopefully now that your truck is tended to, it will set your mind and body at easy. Well… at least until you dig into the next project!